For My Friend, Nana.
Romans 11:26- And in this way all Israel will be saved. As it is written: 'The deliverer will come from Zion; he will turn godlessness away from Jacob.
(27) And this is my covenant with them when I take away their sins."
(28) And as far as the gospel is concerned, they are enemies for your sake; but as far as election is concerned, they are beloved on account of the fathers,
(29) For God's gifts and his call are irrevocable.
... the message bible interprets Romans 11 verse 29 as, "God's gifts and God's call are under full warranty- never canceled, never rescinded." (my favourite verse from this scripture)
Nana, we are very much the same when it comes to how overwhelmed we get when we can't seem to get something right or we allow ourselves to feel so condemned, but I came across this sermon today that really made me think of you. The sermon was taken from Romans 11 verses 26-29. It discussed how this whole christian walk is really more about God then it is about us. We as imperfect human beings will fall and will make mistakes. When God gave us the gift of salvation He knew every little mistake we would make and He was aware that it would take us a million tries before we got it right. Before the earth was formed God was thinking of you. He fashioned you to be a woman of intricate detail that maybe only He would ever understand. He knew what all of your weaknesses would be and all of your strengths when He decided to give you this amazing purpose. He knew how all of these specific things about you would play a role in who you are and how you interact with others.
I say all of this to bring it back to the reason for your being, God.
When He gave you this purpose He already knew that He would be the one who delivers you from all of your sins. Verse 26 states that the deliverer will turn godlessness away. This is his promise to you (verse 27). It isn't a matter of whether or not He will do it because we know that He will. This promise is more about God then it is about you. Even though you are fickle and your feelings may change, God never does. This is His promise. He will deliver you. The best part of this whole thing, which is the part you were most worried about is that His calling and His gifts that He gave to you will not be revoked. Regardless of who you are and how many times you may fall. God will not take away the purpose He has for your life. He called you so He will qualify you. So even when it seems to be the opposite you and I should know that God's gift's will never be canceled solely because of who He is.
I know you already know all of this, but after our conversation last night I know it can't hurt to be reminded.